Why do people swim in the pool?

• Exercise
• Stay fit
• Burn off calories
• Prepare for a triathlon
• Learn how not to drown
• Swim away the day’s frustration
• Show off to friends who can’t
• Show off well-conditioned bodies in tight-fitting and barely-there bikinis or speedos
• Show off speed and different strokes to swimmers in other lanes
• Because the pool is there
• Because it is hard to swim on land

I try to make it to the gym to swim at least 3 times a week.  I don’t do Zumba anymore because my right knee won’t allow me to do the usual dance routines.  It is unfortunate, since I love to dance.  Alas!

So, swimming is the next best thing.  Oh, I occasionally hit the weights and exercise machines, but these will be addressed as a different topic some other time.

My preparation to swim involves:

• Putting on my jammer swimsuit
  I do this at home and, depending on the season, I wear either a pair of shorts or sweat pants over it.  Varicose veins have to be covered up, you know. Oh, and not to mention my beer belly.  HA HA HA!
• Pull out goggles, snorkel, and swimming fins from my gym bag
• Put locker key inside swimsuit with cable hanging out
• Take a shower
  I tell you, if I catch another totally-dry swimmer preparing to jump in the pool, I’ll scream!
• Put spit into my goggles to prevent fogging
• Put on goggles and fins
• Test out the water temperature and grumble if it is cold
• Jump into pool with right fingers pinching nose
• Put on snorkel

Now, this Mark-Spitz-wannabe is prepared to do several 25-meter laps.  The first few strokes usually determine the number of laps I can do in a series.  Oftentimes, I can do 8, with a break at end of pool to catch my breath, reapply spit on my goggles, blow out snot, and wash saliva off my snorkel mouthpiece.  And, if there is enough remaining energy, 3 more series of 8 with final 4 laps without snorkel.

As I traverse the lane, I occupy my mind with several things to make the exercise less boring:

• Exercise is good for me
• Tighten stomach muscles
• Stretch out arms as far as possible
• Flap the fins in unison with the strokes
• Visualize the colors of the rainbow and usually in the order of the rainbow using my mnemonic:  VIGBYOR (Violet, Indigo, Green, Blue, Yellow, Orange, and Red)
• Run my lines, if I am cast in a current theatre production
• Check out whether a swimmer is in next lane
• Concentrate on lines on pool bottom to stay center of lane
• Count strokes in series of 10
• Find answers for personal and global problems/issues
• What post-workout snack or meal and where to snarf it up?
  I usually go to Denny’s since it is right around the corner.  Making up for spent calories, enjoying senior discount, and cashier checking off an occurrence on my senior discount card are things to look forward as I wiggle my butt on the counter stool.

Oh, interesting things do happen too:

• Patron catching me rehearsing my lines in a play at the end of the pool
• Lady in next lane screaming at me that I was getting her head wet as I swam by her
  I was totally surprised by such a displeasure.  But being a gentleman, I just moved to a different lane to get out of her way.  I must say that while taking a shower afterwards, I got quite upset for not telling her off.  She was in the pool and didn’t want to get wet?  I could have told her, “Lady, you’re in the swimming pool and not in a beauty parlor!”  A friend told me that I should have swam under to grab her legs to pull her down.  Now, that would have been a hoot!
• Listening to piped in new age music
• Watching triathletes going at it
• Seeing senior citizens stretching and rebuilding muscles in the Walker Lane

So, why do I continue swimming in the pool?  

Well, primarily to exercise.  Besides, I am paying big bucks for gym membership.  Hence, I might as well get wet in it.

What about you?  Do you swim?  If so, what’s your favorite stroke?  Which of the whys stands out to you?  Or, do you have another to add to the list?